Goals and Life
The future is a scary preposition. I always assume that life will go on without any hiccups, I am coasting I boast, and then something happens, spiralling me into the throes of change. The greatest change they say occurs at the edge of chaos. Life is that chaos.
Sometimes I take a minute and try to think as to what I would be doing five years from now, two years from now, and I start shivering, I have absolutely no idea whatsoever, I could be dead for all practical reasons and not miss a beat, literally. A man without a dream, is a rudderless ship a sorry sight, its equivlent to an amputated heart, one that beats for beating sake not for something, not for someone, without any value, its just an appendage. They say its as great a shame to move without dreaming as to dream without moving.
They say the three grand essentials to life are something to do, something to love and something to hope for. I definitely am not in love, I dont have anything to do now, atleast anything I value and absolutely no hope for the future, in essence I am a zombie. Wait wait, dont write me of yet....or should I write myself off. Let me try to find the goals that make me tick. I said wait.
It is so essential to have goals, short term and long term, the frution of which or rather the hope of it thereof makes life livable. I think I have small goals, I want to play better volleyball, bowl better, dance better, play better racquet ball, win the next lottery, yeah right! these help me go through everyday life. I am never going to be a world champ in any of these (nor win the lottery) and I know that, but I am just yearning to be better and looking forward to something with immediate payback which makes the day go by, in anticipation, in hope, in planning, in defeat, in victory in work. Its these short term goals that keep me alive, keep me running.
If you have something to look forward to every week, even one small thing, that week goes by quickly, someone told me that, and I find it true. Having something to look forward to at the end of the day makes the day fly by. Its something to look up to, as to a short term goal. I need to be alive to make it to that party, to that volleyball game, to that book club meeting, maybe I am putting it wrong, the anticipation of the fun you will be having will tide you by, there you go. I goto the gym on monday evenings, I have a volleyball league game on tuesdays, I goto Tango class on wednesday, I have bowling league on Thursdays, Friday is usully movie night, dinner night or hang out with friends night. Racquetball games are scheuled for saturday or sunday, I also try to goto the gym saturdays and sundays. I have book club once a month on Sundays. I talk cooking classes with a friend on saturdays, there is usually a party Saturday Night, Sunday night I have another volleyball league, tango practice, colleyball open gym on sunday mornings etc etc. with all this stuff the days just fly by. A friend of mine used to say, Adarsh you put your leg in so many boats, and watching you jump from one boat to another with the risk of falling into the water anytime, its ridiculous, but sure fun to watch. My mantra has always been, if you can do both why compromise.
But events like that are not like a bunch of flowers which however randomly you string together they usually form a pretty garland. My small events strung together will not form a garland thats called my life. It will be a life, thats given, but it wont be something that I can be proud of. Its not something that will make sense few years from now, leave alone 20 years from now. Thats where long term goals come into the picture. There are short term goals that form the individual flowers, but its the long term goals that will give form to the garland, something you can wear and ascend to the next life (go figure, what if I am a cow in the next life). All the little flowers need not add up perfectly in airthmetic progression, but they have to make sense, thats all I need. In prothought or afterthought it doesnt matter, but it has to make sense.
We all know the end result of life, death, there is no escaping that, and its not something we look forward to, it doesnt make life go by, but when the destination is not pretty, the journey has to be, to make life worthwhile, thats where long term goals come into play, now to find that, maybe I need to make that a short term goal out of that.
That is one area I come woefully short, is it that I dont care, or is it that I am not capable of any, either way I feel empty, I admire people who do, and I wish I could have a dream too. They say, if you dont have a dream, find someone, whose dream resonates with you, and work with them, feed of their dream in the process making one for yourself, but how does one resonate with something, I think some peoples dreams are cool, and the little thigns they do add up, those little flowers are all in some airthemetic progression, on its way to make sense, I wish I had something like that.
What do we call a long term plan, is it something like I will build a fortune 500 company, I will win the pulitzer, I shall become a CEO, or is it something like I will build a house, have a good family. Is it something that should be within my means, or something I should aim to reach, a never ending beanstalk, but jack does get there, after then what, which monster will I meet. Is it good to set something that is achieveable, or something I try to death, say you live your life trying to reach somewhere and you reach it, you still have to live the rest of your life.
Anyhow, I shall wait, I shall think, I shall hope that I find something to do
Sometimes I take a minute and try to think as to what I would be doing five years from now, two years from now, and I start shivering, I have absolutely no idea whatsoever, I could be dead for all practical reasons and not miss a beat, literally. A man without a dream, is a rudderless ship a sorry sight, its equivlent to an amputated heart, one that beats for beating sake not for something, not for someone, without any value, its just an appendage. They say its as great a shame to move without dreaming as to dream without moving.
They say the three grand essentials to life are something to do, something to love and something to hope for. I definitely am not in love, I dont have anything to do now, atleast anything I value and absolutely no hope for the future, in essence I am a zombie. Wait wait, dont write me of yet....or should I write myself off. Let me try to find the goals that make me tick. I said wait.
It is so essential to have goals, short term and long term, the frution of which or rather the hope of it thereof makes life livable. I think I have small goals, I want to play better volleyball, bowl better, dance better, play better racquet ball, win the next lottery, yeah right! these help me go through everyday life. I am never going to be a world champ in any of these (nor win the lottery) and I know that, but I am just yearning to be better and looking forward to something with immediate payback which makes the day go by, in anticipation, in hope, in planning, in defeat, in victory in work. Its these short term goals that keep me alive, keep me running.
If you have something to look forward to every week, even one small thing, that week goes by quickly, someone told me that, and I find it true. Having something to look forward to at the end of the day makes the day fly by. Its something to look up to, as to a short term goal. I need to be alive to make it to that party, to that volleyball game, to that book club meeting, maybe I am putting it wrong, the anticipation of the fun you will be having will tide you by, there you go. I goto the gym on monday evenings, I have a volleyball league game on tuesdays, I goto Tango class on wednesday, I have bowling league on Thursdays, Friday is usully movie night, dinner night or hang out with friends night. Racquetball games are scheuled for saturday or sunday, I also try to goto the gym saturdays and sundays. I have book club once a month on Sundays. I talk cooking classes with a friend on saturdays, there is usually a party Saturday Night, Sunday night I have another volleyball league, tango practice, colleyball open gym on sunday mornings etc etc. with all this stuff the days just fly by. A friend of mine used to say, Adarsh you put your leg in so many boats, and watching you jump from one boat to another with the risk of falling into the water anytime, its ridiculous, but sure fun to watch. My mantra has always been, if you can do both why compromise.
But events like that are not like a bunch of flowers which however randomly you string together they usually form a pretty garland. My small events strung together will not form a garland thats called my life. It will be a life, thats given, but it wont be something that I can be proud of. Its not something that will make sense few years from now, leave alone 20 years from now. Thats where long term goals come into the picture. There are short term goals that form the individual flowers, but its the long term goals that will give form to the garland, something you can wear and ascend to the next life (go figure, what if I am a cow in the next life). All the little flowers need not add up perfectly in airthmetic progression, but they have to make sense, thats all I need. In prothought or afterthought it doesnt matter, but it has to make sense.
We all know the end result of life, death, there is no escaping that, and its not something we look forward to, it doesnt make life go by, but when the destination is not pretty, the journey has to be, to make life worthwhile, thats where long term goals come into play, now to find that, maybe I need to make that a short term goal out of that.
That is one area I come woefully short, is it that I dont care, or is it that I am not capable of any, either way I feel empty, I admire people who do, and I wish I could have a dream too. They say, if you dont have a dream, find someone, whose dream resonates with you, and work with them, feed of their dream in the process making one for yourself, but how does one resonate with something, I think some peoples dreams are cool, and the little thigns they do add up, those little flowers are all in some airthemetic progression, on its way to make sense, I wish I had something like that.
What do we call a long term plan, is it something like I will build a fortune 500 company, I will win the pulitzer, I shall become a CEO, or is it something like I will build a house, have a good family. Is it something that should be within my means, or something I should aim to reach, a never ending beanstalk, but jack does get there, after then what, which monster will I meet. Is it good to set something that is achieveable, or something I try to death, say you live your life trying to reach somewhere and you reach it, you still have to live the rest of your life.
Anyhow, I shall wait, I shall think, I shall hope that I find something to do
posted by adarsh adarsh at 9:14 PM
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