My fight with mr cough and mrs cold

I am coming off a very hard fought battle, I fought the most common and simplest disease in the world, the cold and cough virus. It was the coafter-effect (new word to be added, coafeter, something which began with something and also persisted after it) of a flu strain going around. Here is my story about fighting that evil megaevil couldcough devil.

The doctor first said she will treat me for bronchitis, well who am I to fight that esteemed wisdom, she gave me some antibiotics and I took them with gusto, I like that name, antibiotic, its a wicked name, like antibody, anyhow she also told me to take tylenol, sudofed and drink some cough syrup. The fever got scared and left in 10 days (hail antibiotic though scientific wisom says you cant fight bacteria, but you can fight viruses or something like that, and if you get the flu, its only your body that has to prepare the appropriate antibodies). Well 10 days later I was still stuck with the cough and cold so I called on the doctor again, this time she gave me the strongest dose of cough syrup possible, and another cough tablet, she said we shall take care of it, but another 5 days later that sucker was still going strong, so I decided to fight it as only adarsh can.

I thought uptill now I was being reactive, drinking warm water, and taking useless tablets so now I decided to take the battle to the enemy. I drank some medicinal chinese almond soup created by Elsie, drank a glass of hot milk mixed with lots of ground pepper and turmeric (my moms recipe), drank half a bottle of cough syrup, a spoon full of honey, a little stroh (80% alcohol) and and and woke up the next day and found out I had lost my voice.

Yes, lost my voice,I coudnt speak, my singing career, my political career, my movie stardom, my acceptance speech for the pulitzer all bid their respective goodbyes. It was actually funny, I coundt say 3 words without coughing, coudnt say a word without sounding like darth vader (fortunately the star wars series was already screwed up by lucas) but I didnt quit. I tried a combinaton of the above for another week.

I started drinking warm water with honey during the day, hot foods, soup, the hot milk concoction, this with cough syrup (which I later chucked out), halls, vicks you take your picks a minute, stayed off smoke and alcohol and ofcourse spent the next week in utter misery.

Then I had another idea, I thought let me drown the sucker in scotch , so I started drinking my favourite drink, premium scotch no rocks everywhere, die mofu die, die mofu die. Well I did get happy and drunk, but the cough still remained.

Its been 3 weeks now, I am still coughing, my voice is still gone darth vader, Alison suggested cranberry juice and pomogrenate juice, the cab driver suggested I drink anti-oxidant tea (at this stage I was taking suggestions from anybody, somebody and noboy) , so I tried both, juices tea with honey and lime if anything had a hint of anti-oxident I was there, even smoked antioxident hookah (now that didnt help, did it)

My brother suggestd amocyllin, somebody said I should visit the temple and I was even considering vodoo magic, I tried to psyche it out of my system by doing whooosa and telling myself you can do it, you can beat the cough, you can do it, you are winning, I think I can, I think I can, I think I can and some how I am ok now.

Its been just over two months, Ive seen it all, blood in my cough, green colour phlems, brown, yellow (the rainbow phlems I called it), darth vader, coughs where my lungs almost came out, I even threw up coughing, pshew, now I am ok. Finally it just left one day, it just decided to pack its bag and leave though I would like to think my body won, the cough won the battles but my body, rather my antibody won the war. I have a new respect for healthy life, the power of my body and world medicine.